I agree with you that attitude is EVERYTHING! But I must be honest that sometimes after fighting one battle of some kind or another; over and over again, a human being can have what I call "Battle Fatigue." I have always been a "cup 1/2 full" kind of person and took each day with a positive attitude. During the past seven years, I have lost my mother, my sister, and a niece all too early in life. My marriage ended when I discovered my husband was having an affair with the husband of one of my closest friends. I went back to school to get a Master's degree in Social Work so that I could do what I love for the rest of my life (I was a stay at home mom prior to my divorce) and have had to worry about finances and raise a daughter alone. I have no family nearby and since I have gone back to work full-time to pay the bills and keep a roof over our heads, I don't see my friends like I used to. I spend nearly every weekend sleeping so that I can have energy to push myself through the next 40 hour workweek. As of Monday this week, I'm on short term disability until 4/1 and received notice today that my employer will only hold my job until 2/22!
Could I use an attitude adjustment? You betcha! I'm just so danged dog tired of fighting the good fight that I'm spent....hence: "the Battle Fatigue." I'm hoping to get an appointment with a psychiatrist and a good therapist to help me cope with this chronic disease that is invisible to others.
What a beautiful, brave and transparent reply. I felt like I was reading my own experience in many ways.I know that it seems like nobody can really undertand our plight so much of the time; I know God does though, and something very precious is being formed in all of us as we make it through these tests and the trials that go with them. . . sometimes, one moment at a time. You aren't alone my sister. I know you must be an amazing woman. Godbless you.
Lori
Lisa Jakee Hilton said:
Hi Robert:
I agree with you that attitude is EVERYTHING! But I must be honest that sometimes after fighting one battle of some kind or another; over and over again, a human being can have what I call "Battle Fatigue." I have always been a "cup 1/2 full" kind of person and took each day with a positive attitude. During the past seven years, I have lost my mother, my sister, and a niece all too early in life. My marriage ended when I discovered my husband was having an affair with the husband of one of my closest friends. I went back to school to get a Master's degree in Social Work so that I could do what I love for the rest of my life (I was a stay at home mom prior to my divorce) and have had to worry about finances and raise a daughter alone. I have no family nearby and since I have gone back to work full-time to pay the bills and keep a roof over our heads, I don't see my friends like I used to. I spend nearly every weekend sleeping so that I can have energy to push myself through the next 40 hour workweek. As of Monday this week, I'm on short term disability until 4/1 and received notice today that my employer will only hold my job until 2/22!
Could I use an attitude adjustment? You betcha! I'm just so danged dog tired of fighting the good fight that I'm spent....hence: "the Battle Fatigue." I'm hoping to get an appointment with a psychiatrist and a good therapist to help me cope with this chronic disease that is invisible to others.
I love the expression "Battle Fatigue". I am also a survivor of many of life's trials,(breast cancer, lip cancer, three kidney stone surgeries in one year, etc) and often wondering when the grace period begins. So many "things" have been taken away, but on a good day I remind myself it gives me the opportunity to examine and appreciate what is left. We had to file bankruptcy when I could no longer work and I had to sale my wedding ring and everything that I thought gave meaning to my life just to make the house payment. Life experiences constantly change and thank goodness we are here for each other being able to lend support in some small way. You sound like an incredible woman, maybe we write a book!
Lisa Jakee Hilton said:
Hi Robert:
I agree with you that attitude is EVERYTHING! But I must be honest that sometimes after fighting one battle of some kind or another; over and over again, a human being can have what I call "Battle Fatigue." I have always been a "cup 1/2 full" kind of person and took each day with a positive attitude. During the past seven years, I have lost my mother, my sister, and a niece all too early in life. My marriage ended when I discovered my husband was having an affair with the husband of one of my closest friends. I went back to school to get a Master's degree in Social Work so that I could do what I love for the rest of my life (I was a stay at home mom prior to my divorce) and have had to worry about finances and raise a daughter alone. I have no family nearby and since I have gone back to work full-time to pay the bills and keep a roof over our heads, I don't see my friends like I used to. I spend nearly every weekend sleeping so that I can have energy to push myself through the next 40 hour workweek. As of Monday this week, I'm on short term disability until 4/1 and received notice today that my employer will only hold my job until 2/22!
Could I use an attitude adjustment? You betcha! I'm just so danged dog tired of fighting the good fight that I'm spent....hence: "the Battle Fatigue." I'm hoping to get an appointment with a psychiatrist and a good therapist to help me cope with this chronic disease that is invisible to others.
Threads like this are why I love this forum. Great thoughts youâve expressed, Robert,as well as all the replies.
I remember my months of total paralysis in Rush hosp. in Chicago.
Really looked forward to the regular visits with the psychologist, especially after the two fatal misdiagnoses!
Then there was this one volunteer who came around with the book and magazine cart.She was a tiny black woman from the south side whoâd been forced to retire from nursing due to her age. She offered to read to me since I couldnât even hold a book. When I asked her if she had a Bible in that cart, her face lit up. Good memories indeed.
Life is good.
Oh yeah, Robert. Weâll all hear about when the dead come to your reunion!
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I wonât return to work . The daily struggles take to much of a toll. I will move slower , sometimes whith a cane sometimes with a wheel chair. Most of all I laugh wth my family it is preferred to crying over the pain. I am improving my life with good choices. Good humor and friends.
Positive attitude and a sense of humor helps all of us to get through the bad days. Just when you think that you are feeling better and life is good, you slip on that 'CIDP banana peel' and have to start over again. Laughing is the best medicine.
Take care, my friend.
Robert Martin said:
I won't return to work . The daily struggles take to much of a toll. I will move slower , sometimes whith a cane sometimes with a wheel chair. Most of all I laugh wth my family it is preferred to crying over the pain. I am improving my life with good choices. Good humor and friends.
I realize this post is old but I wanted to thank you for it. Beautifully written and inspiring. I honestly never felt a purpose in my life before getting sick and now that I have been through hell, I appreciate every single day so much more. You are doing it right! Keep it up & thank you for the reminder.
I forgot all about that post. Thanks for reminding me. Since that post I have continued working - now I even get to work from home as a reservation agent for United Airlines.
My mother-in-law passed away but she was able to attend my son's wedding before her illness took her from us.The wedding and the funeral were in Las Vegas so we have been there twice in the past 2 years,
My wife and I have visited Traverse City, Michigan and Cruised to the Bahamas from the Port of Miami.
I am still using my cane to steady my balance. I am enjoying every day.